Tuesday, April 26, 2005

Wonderful experiences

I had the most wonderful experience this weekend when I escaped to Coorg for a quick trip. This may sound kinky but believe me, this was one of the most beautiful moments of my life. A small creature, a trusting life and big me. I felt an overwhelming urge of affection and the need to protect the small one :)

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Friday, April 22, 2005


For the first time after MBA, I realised MBA was all crap! And what I didn't learn from a three month course in MBA, I learnt in a three hour meeting in office today.

Thursday, April 14, 2005

Being Away from Home

Guess what is the best thing about being away from home? It’s going back home of course! It’s been two years since I flew the next, so to speak, and these years have been anything but good unlike the golden periods I enjoyed after growing up (ya, right!) - Exciting, Adventurous, Enjoyable, Torturous – yes, but not ‘Good’. The funny thing was, I always wanted to leave home- always- believe me. But the moment it seemed like it may actually happen, I didn’t want to! It wasn’t just cold feet and it wasn’t just fear of facing the big bad world all by myself, though they were part of it too. But the primary reason I wanted to stay back was because I became too attached to my family and friends or rather, I realized I have become too attached to them. What’s more I loved being that way!!

But, as they say, contentment is the first step to failure (they do say that, don’t they? I mean they should! Its kinda true!) and I, being the “seeker” that I am (I like to call myself that :)), didn’t want to be content of all things! So I decided “VJ, enough is enough, get out, get out of your comfort zones, go see what the world has to offer to you

Here I am, two years later, enlightened like you wouldn’t believe and the funny thing is I still want to go back home. But I have become resigned to leading a life alone (It is actually against human nature did you know? Humans, from their animal behavior perspective, are the perpetual tribe/community forming creatures!) and the seeker in me has started saying “Get out, get out, you have formed a home here too so get out before it becomes too comfortable!” and am wondering if I should listen???

Coming to the best part of being away, it’s those crazy moments when you suddenly decide you need to be home, come what may! Of course it helps if you are located within a few hundred kilometers from your birth abode. Today is one such day for me- I have decided I need to be home by nightfall – I am not going to let anything stop me – not availability of train/bus seat, not my boss granting me leave and least of all not my own self that says wait for the weekend! No sir, no! I am going. Let me see what stops me.

(The fact that I am a proud Tamilian and that today is Tamil New Year Day doesn’t figure, not at all! Its those community gatherings am interested in – I love being part of a friendly tribe, preferably my own)

Monday, April 11, 2005


Life was the little flower I saw on the way up the mountain
But my vision was fixed firm up and I didn’t spare it a glance
I put one step after another and left everything behind
The only hope, the cloud hovering over top promising to quench my thirst

At times, I stopped to catch my breath and caught a glimpse of the color
But the thought of a brighter color on top propelled me forward with no further thought
The early morning dew disappeared all too soon under a glaring sun and my conviction along
I carried on nonetheless, for I have come so far and there is no returning back

A moment of giddiness, the first creeping doubt, my sweating body insisted on embracing the ground
With a barren tree for company, its bark shade my friend, I leaned back and closed my eyes
And felt the lightest of touch, a fleeting memory and a promise of happiness
Smiling I looked – a tiny moth intent on finding his food flew here and there, with no seeming direction

Though my heart felt the oneness of being, my mind insisted on calling it a fool
High up on a dry mountain, with just a few tufts of grass, he had come seeking what is easily available down, on the call of a fickle smell
And as is common of moths, he too shall die soon, maybe of hunger, maybe of old age, maybe of the sun
But what will only remain is the scattered semblance of his dull body fading deep into the ground, with no signs of his hectic life

In a moment of bizarre coincidence, I saw him flutter and float to the ground
A little wind from nowhere tried her best to mock life and lifted his body high up again
But in a little while, she got bored and dropping the heaviness, sought her own course elsewhere
There was silence and there was the sun, there was the tree and the me- and the little moth, alive a moment before

As he touched the ground, the human heart, foolish as ever, sought a last drop of hope
Maybe the flower would help but suddenly it seemed too far below for either of us to reach
I have passed Life and so has he
In a moment of stillness, in this great cosmos, both of us became utterly alone and we were content

Friday, April 1, 2005

Gmail turns one

This is great news because they are willing to be generous and share the good fortune with us :) I have had my Gmail account for almost a year, thanks to Blogger! I still remember those few sceptics who talked about Gmail scanning our mail and refused to open an account with Gmail but today Gmail is more than accepted as the email service provider. And the best thing is Gmail now allows pop access.

It feels good to know Gmail has come beyond those initial hiccups. Way to go!