Shifting to Bangalore was one of the best things that could have happened to me- it opened my eyes to so many new people and places - not necessarily in Bangalore but ironically in the town I left behind! Chennai seemed like such a different city when I went back after a month and the people seemed to have changed too!! When I got the first letter from home (written in my fathers scribbly handwriting!) I felt so melancholic and so sad but ecstatically happy too at the same time. This was the first time I received a written proof of my parents love and it is wonderful to know there are two people in this world who would do anything for you.
When my friend Lakshmi used to talk about her responsibility to her parents, her duties as a first kid I could never understand. Ya, making your parents happy is important but should it come above your own personal choices and happiness? - was not at all sure about it then but so so sure now. As the much pampered, second and last daughter in my family, growing up was one smooth sailing! No strict rules or discipline- no decision taken out of my hand unlike my poor elder sis! I was more of a pet that needed loving than a daughter who needed guidance. I was left to fly wherever I wanted, I was left to choose whatever I wanted- from my dresses to schools to jobs to career to what not!
After spending more than four years swinging like a wild monkey from tree to tree, I came to the conclusion that my life needed some handling and thus the major tantrums and fights- to go back to college, a new place, to more freedom and independence! Only now I realise all those hurtful words that I uttered to my parents, all those wild fights & arguments that I got into was all against myself and my parents were supposed to be but mere spectators and definitely not the fighting boards!
I could not resist writing back a big mail to my parents (leaving my exam marks to follow right at the end of the letter of course! ;) ) When I read back the whole letter written while on an emotional high, I was so surprised to find that I sounded so much like a big woman than their small shy daughter. The kid is long gone or is so deeply buried inside the grown up Vaijayanthi , even I have difficulty seeing her at times! Wonder whether my parents miss their sweet second child?